It's in the air

I went to pick up my books for the Fall semester and since I'm an online student, it's one of the few times I will be visiting campus. Turns out, I was there the same day they were hosting orientation for new students. The excitement, anticipation and the feeling of the newness of the school year was palpatable. I had forgotten just how refreshing a new school year could be. It was a necessary reality check. I love to learn but for some reason I was just not as geared up as I always get at the prospect of new supplies and knowing that I would end the semester just a tad bit smarter than I started.

Yucky guy

I was on my way back to work from a frantic lunch of shopping as I passed a church sign that said, "Beware of the high cost of low living." Of course the meaning speaks for itself. There's not much need to expound but I decided to share my little spin on it. You definitely won't see this on a church sign. . .well, maybe. Here it is: Being skeezy ain't easy.

There are a few people that I know that love the bar life. They love chasing skirt and casual encounters are nothing. They have no one to answer to, regardless of who they hurt in the process, which is typically themselves. Every day is surreal. It's a haze. Their minds are so inundated with alcohol and promiscuity they can't even function. They live to go to the same place every night, look at the same people and drink enormous amounts of alcohol.

Don't get me wrong. I enjoy going out from time to time. I enjoy a nice dirty martini or glass of wine, but my life is so much fuller for having relationships rather than acquaintances and being able to remember the things that I experience without the effects of a hangover to hinder.

I'm not saying that everyone who hangs out at a bar is that type of person either but life is not always one big party. There are things that need to be cultivated to ensure that your latter years will truly be golden. I hope that these people that I know don't wake up one day and they're 35 years old with nothing show for it but an unimpressive long list of sexual partners and liver disease due to years of intoxicating themselves.

So you get all this because of a single sign that I saw on the way back to work from lunch. Imagine what happens when I read a paragraph.

Ahhhh, love. . .

So I'm over my PMS/Menstrual rage and I've run across some notes I jotted down a few weeks ago. I tend to get thoughts and inspiration in waves. In this case, they came to me while driving to lunch with my honey. I was thinking about how much different and special this relationship is in comparison to anything I had previously. There were so many things that I now have that I did not before and the irony is, I didn't even know what I was missing. Here's what those messy "driving while writing" notes said:

Love endures.

Love allows for mistakes. (And, as it turns out, cranky days when your hormones are uncontrollable.)

BUT love does not cause damage.

Love means accepting a person just as they are but refusing to accept inappropriate behavior.

Love is holding someone accountable to do what's right according to God.

Love is an intimacy, another gift, that is given by God and we must handle it with care, just as our salvation.

Beyond falling in love, when our brains go all wonky, it is a choice to love someone. It is a promise and it takes work.

Love is having the safety to express any emotion you may feel and knowing that it will be handled with the utmost care.

So those are the things that decided to find their way into my head that day. I realize that this all can be found in Corinthians but this was a personal revelation to me. I love when that happens. It makes you realize just how blessed you truly are.

Ugh

It’s just another ordinary day with ordinary routines, schedules with the aches and pains that go along with it. I’m tired and very cranky. Being a woman sucks on some days. For the most part, my life is very blessed and I’m happy to be alive with a job, a wonderful fiancé and a beautiful daughter . . . but on days that I think my uterus may fall out, I’m a little peeved. I’m sorry if this is too much information for some, but for me and every other woman on the face of the earth, it is a very real and hateful reality. Your hormones wreak havoc on your every emotion, thought, desire, and hunger pang and all you can think about is crawling onto the couch with a good book, soft pillow and warm blanket and hide out from the world. Ah, but no. I’m here at work listening to other people’s gripes and complaints all the while thinking, “Whatever buddy. When you feel like someone is stabbing you repeatedly in the lower abdomen then we’ll talk but until then, you and your water bill are simply a minor problem that I really don’t give a jack about. Have a nice day.”

The other negative side to this whole situation is the fact that any time something is said that sounds even remotely like a negative; the tears come or anger flairs and it’s completely irrational and uncontrollable. It ain’t pretty. A beautiful, mild mannered woman can turn into a raving lunatic with hair standing on end and spittle flying and there’s no stopping it. I can say I’m not that bad but I can become basket case for a few days out of the month and I hate it. I hate being the victim of nature and taking out the frustration on the people I love. Adam only thought he was being punished by having to die but that’s not the case. He was being punished by Eve’s mood swings (and the removal of God’s constant fellowship but that’s only a side note in this rant). Death was a release from that imprisonment. Go figure. So not only does a woman suffer the physical side effects, but everyone in their path suffers some type of emotional stress if not physical disfigurement. Thanks to Eve and that damned serpent, we become moronic every 28 days.

Mmmmmmm. . .cupcakes.