Excuses, excuses

So, I'm late to the party on this one:

Let me just point out, I look nothing like Maria Kang.  I'm thin, yes, but I'm not a fitness model or a wellness coach.  I don't have three kids under the age of three.  That's pure insanity and kudos to those who can manage.  Odds are this woman was in fantastic shape prior to getting pregnant and during her pregnancy.  You don't just pop into the gym with an 8 month old, much less two other small children, and manage to look like this.  But I digress.

What's my excuse?

Well, I don't have one.

I have reasons.  Three really good reasons that fill up my newsfeed or Instagram account on a daily basis.  Three really pretty reasons, if I do say so myself.  I also have a small business and a church that I give some time to.  Up until last semester, I was also in school part time.  By the time I lay my head on my pillow, around midnight usually, my day has been filled with projects, clients, homework, cooking, cleaning and diapers.  And I love it.  That's my life.  That's my reason.

She's recently been under fire again with a new picture and a new "no excuse" campaign.  She's attempting to be "inspirational" and not understanding that her priorities don't equate to everyone else's priorities and that's really what this is all about.  She.  Just.  Doesn't.  Get.  It.

You can read the entire article here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/03/07/maria-kang-photo-excuse_n_4918766.html.

I go for gusto in everything I do.  To look like this I would have to spend a few hours a week in a gym.  That means something in my life would slip.  I'm not willing to give up that time with my family or my business or my church to make sure I'm a "hot mom."  Sister, we aren't all built to be "strong, not skinny."  These images and this "campaign" is unintentionally shaming people into thinking we don't do enough when the truth of the matter is that we all do too much.

In the article she says that to raise a healthy child you must be a  healthy parent.  Well, duh.  But healthy isn't all about the body.  My daughter doesn't need to see me pose in my short shorts and my sports bra to get the idea that eating right and staying active is healthy.  She needs to see me live a life of faith.  She needs to see me take care of her and interact with others in a positive way.

If these images motivate you then by all means use them!!!  If they don't, then don't.  My problem is this: these things have a way of burying themselves in your subconscious.  They pop up when you're doing something as insignificant as putting on your jeans that you don't wear like you did before the last kid.  Let's think about the definition of health and the definition of excuse.  Put these two things in perspective before attempting to "motivate" the world by insinuating that we're all a bunch of fat losers if we don't look like you.

Bitter?  No.  Irritated?  Yes.

My life is not her life.  My path is not her path.  My family is not her family.  I look the way I look and live the way I live because I want it that way.  No excuse to be found.

I Will Follow Him

So I'm using the title to draw you in, because, really?  Who can resist a play on words?  Especially a play on words that was used in Sister Act?  Sister Act!!!  A movie I may have watched about a bijillion times and I still get chills when Tanya Tucker's voice comes from the little red headed nun.  I will never be able to explain that.

In all seriousness, though, I have been truly struggling with the concept of how we as Christians relate to the world around us.  I feel like I have been pushing the first and most important commandment, love, so hard that I've lost sight of His law at times.  I feel so much disdain for legalism that I sometimes forget how important the law is to those who believe.

Mind what I said here and emphasize it, the law is important to those who believe.  While this world may have been made for us we have to remember that it is quiet broken.  It's broken before we enter via birth, it's broken when we get here and it will always be broken until the triumphant return of Christ.  We cannot expect to win every soul to Christ by slamming the law down over their heads.  There is no desire to serve Christ if we start there.

Do not love this world or the things in the world.  If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.  For all that is in the world--the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life--is not of the Father but is of the world.

I John 2:15-16

So let's break that down.  The lust of the flesh is sexual immorality (let's refrain from being hoochies), the lust of the eyes is materialism or greed (eyes on your own paper people) and the pride of life is position and power (check your ego at the door).  These are the loves of the world.  We cannot serve these things and truly be followers of Christ.  Some of these things are stumbling blocks because, again, we are a broken people.  There's one thing on this list that I didn't see in reference to the world...people.  People are not "the world" but they are in the world.  "People" is a term with which we refer to the weak vessels of clay that house the beautiful, treasured, created soul that God has placed within.  When we discuss issues that pertain to the Christian you must remember that "the world" are things or actions within this sphere while people are something totally separate. 

If you're still with me, I'm going to list a few things that place me at odds with other believers.  But I challenge you to explore the meaning and purpose behind each and see what falls more in line with what God has for us rather than the world.

I believe in the separation of church and state.

• A politician who believes in Christ will allow that belief to effect his job, because that is what believers are called to do, but it should not be the sole reason he is elected.  Who is the best person for said job?
• God gave us free will to decide how we are to live our lives.  Why should our faith impose on someone else if God himself refuses to impose on them?  Let them choose.
• Contrary to popular Christian opinion, this country is solidly based on this premise.  It's historical.  Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Payne and Benjamin Franklin were deists; meaning they believed there was a god but not the God that I believe in.  They included this premise solely for the purpose of freedom.

I believe in the right to choose life.

• I feel as though there should be more transparency and information in the clinics that perform something I myself could never do.  Like what the baby looks like at that stage of development, for example.
• This is someone else's decision to make, the same free will premise applies.
• I completely disagree with this decision on a personal level and I pray earnestly for those I know and have known to make this decision.
• See most of the reasons behind the separation of church and state.

I believe that the poor should receive assistance and that all of us should have the same access to health care.

• After all, what did Jesus say about this?
• Secondly, I have been in this situation.  It's hard to know that you must choose between feeding your family or paying your bills.  Not everyone is expecting a hand out of your hard-earned money that is a blessing from God.
• Perhaps if we truly practiced this ourselves we wouldn't need the government to provide programs and aid to others since that seems to be the most common objective I hear, "I don't want the government to tell me I have to do it!"
• See the parable of the talents.

I believe in gun control.

• I am all for you have a gun if you want but I will never understand the need to have weapons that can mow down innocent people in a theater or children who are in a place of education.
• The second amendment was written to allow citizens the right to bear arms against a tyrannical government.  Not to collect weapons for the fun of it.
• Our current system is just not working.  How many more people have to die before we protect one another?  Why are we being so prideful about this?

I realize that my post is long and if you're still reading I truly appreciate it.  Mostly this blog is for my own personal release of thoughts and feelings but I post it here rather than my journal because maybe, just maybe, it may help someone or provide a different perspective on a tumbling world.  If you have any thoughts or feelings on these points I would love to hear them.  I'm always open for meaningful, thought provoking and respectful discussion.

Much love!

You are doing it wrong

What if I told you that you were doing your faith all wrong?  Would you get angry?  Of course you would.  I did.  But today’s methodology of following Christ is being lost in culture and it irks me to no end until I realized that I was trying to softly love people to God.  Sometimes you have to go all crazy tough love on people to get them to see the truth.  I can do that so easily with my family, my kids or my husband but I struggle with the general masses and most especially on the issue of faith.  Here's what's happening in a nutshell:

Conservative Christianity says you have to go by the law.

Progressive Christianity says you have to go by love.

The Truth says it is both.

It’s so easy to find your faith sucked into one of these two categories; thus the way to perdition is wide and the way to God is narrow.  It's easy to believe you are right when you have a large group that agrees with you on issues, uses the same verbiage or tactics but it does not make your way of going about it right.

Ephesians 2:8 says it is grace that saves us.  It is a gift.  None should boast because we are created by Him.  All of these other things are not as important as the true thing which is that we were created as a good work (Genesis 1:31) to perform good works (Ephesians 2:10).  Good works.  We are a good work required to perform good works.  Easy equation.  What about this is so hard? 

Created Good Work = Performer of Good Work

Here are some cultural issues related to what the two sides consider a "good work" and the fallacies that they are.

If your good work is protecting something that was given to you from someone less fortunate then you are lost.  If you feel as though you “worked hard” for something that God has blessed you with then your heart is not in the right place.  Working hard and a good work are two different things.  God placed provision for the orphan and the widow; it is your responsibility to care for them.  Secondly, if you’re more worried about how someone else’s life choices affect you and yours then you are blocking out the sun with the plank in your eye.  There is good news to be shared and that is that He loved the ENTIRE world, regardless of their sin, and sent His precious Son to die.  He DIED.  Why are we objectifying that sacrifice by deciding that sin has variable degrees?  Stop beating people over the head with the law and praying that they come to Christ.  It’s not going to work.

If your good work is making someone feel okay about their sinful choices then you are lost.  If you think that all people can arrive at the same God we serve by exploring other options then you are not a Christian.  It is plainly stated that there is only ONE way.  There are no Buddhist Christians.  That’s like saying you’re a carnivorous vegetarian.  It does not exist.  Stop telling people that sin is okay and hoping that they’ll see Jesus for the love He has for them.  Is it okay for your spouse okay to cheat on you as long as they’re happy?  No.  So don’t expect God to see your efforts as valiant if you cannot stand the thought of being honest and hurting someone’s feelings.  The truth must be spoken and in that regard tact goes a long way.

Jesus was the master at telling people the truth in a way that shocked and provoked thought.  Of course He offended people because the truth can be offensive...why shy away from lighting the way?  But I often ask myself if that was His only intention...to offend.  The answer is no.  He was sent to seek and save that which was lost (Luke 19:10) by the necessary means.  So let's merge these two ideologies and pull the truth out of our rears where we've seemed to have hidden it.  We need to spread the unconditional love of the God with the rebuke of sin on an individual basis.  A change in the heart has the potential to change society.  Make the Gospel a grassroots movement and not a political one.  That is how it started after all.

If something in this message offends you then perhaps you should start digging into it and figure out why it bothers you.  I’d love to hear your thoughts.  You will not insult me if you disagree. 

But you're just a girl

This morning I cracked my Bible for the first time in 2014.  Every morning, while the boy naps, I open the pages of this book.  There are times when the hustle and bustle of out the scheduled norm takes me away from digging into scripture but I usually find my way back once routine returns.  The funny thing is that the older I get the more focused I am in finding insights and sharing my thoughts on what I read.

Right now, I'm following the study on www.SheReadsTruth.com.  The fabulous thing about it is that even if you only have a few minutes a day the scripture and accompanying discussion is powerful.  It really maximizes your time with God.  I typically have about 30 minutes to an hour during nap time but some days, as toddlers do, he decides that sleeping just isn't on his agenda.

So, the current series is on new beginnings.  What better place to start than creation, right?  Something struck me this morning during my reading, Adam's declaration in Genesis 2:23.

"And Adam said:

This is now bone of my bones

Flesh of my flesh;

She shall be called Woman,

Because she was taken out of Man."

My first thought, "Awww, the first love poem..."  Then I started to wonder about what it actually means to be a woman in Biblical terms and began digging into the commentary at the bottom of my Bible.  What I found there struck me with a profound sense of satisfaction.  

See, I've always felt like people look at me like I'm not capable of specific things because I'm petite with blond hair and blue eyes.  I'm somehow fragile or weak or less intelligent because of the way that I look.  But God says no.  No to the idea that a woman is somehow less than a man.  No to the idea that she isn't capable of being as intelligent or weak simply because she can't bench press a couple hundred pounds of iron or open a jar of pickles.  I'll have you know that I open my fair share of jars in this house.

Earlier in chapter 2, God says that he wants Adam to have a "comparable helper."  I can see all the feminists getting hot under the collar.  Hold up.  The term "helper" is not negative in any way.  In fact, God is also referred to as a help in a time of need (Psalm 33:20) and most of us know that God is the biggest, baddest helper of them all.   Women were not created to be secondary to man like some leftover afterthought but to be a companion to man; hence, the rib.  Women are created to be a just right fit with man.

The truly spectacular thing is Adam's reaction to Eve when she is presented to him.  His love poem extols that she is just like him but different.  This intrigues and astounds him.  She is intelligent, not like any other creature he had seen on the earth.  He gave her the name Woman, which is just like his name but different.  A perfect and suitable match to him.  He is completely enamored with her.

Martin Luther said it best, "God might have taken a bone from a toe and thus signified that Adam was to rule over her; or He might have taken a bone from his head to indicate her rule over him.  But by taking a bone from his side, God implied equality and mutual respect."

The Fall brought a much more pronounced difference between the sexes but I will contend until my dying breath that we are all equal.  We are all worthy of respect without limitation to our ability.

As a side note, I am snacking on an apple as I write.  Coincidence?

Girls, Girls, Girls...

Did the title grab your attention?
 

"'Sing and rejoice, O daughter of Zion!  For behold, I am coming and will dwell in your midst,' says the Lord."

Zechariah 2:10

 

 "Rejoice greatly, O daughter of Zion!  Shout, O daughter of Jerusalem!  Behold, your King is coming to you; He is just and having salvation, lowly and riding on a donkey, a colt, the foal of a donkey."

Zechariah 9:9

 

Daughter, a female offspring.  Daughter of Zion, a term of endearment used by God to refer to His people, believers.

Sorry to disappoint you.  The girls I'm going to be discussing today are some bad broads.  But I mean "bad" in the 90s slang good way.  On to the "bad" stuff.

Here's a little background on Zechariah:

Jerusalem has been in exile for 70 years.  Zechariah, a young prophet, tells the people that there is hope amidst desolation.  That the temple will be rebuilt and the Lord would be coming to dwell among them.  What reason would there be not to rejoice?  The spiritually bankrupt sins of their fathers had so decimated the people of Israel that they had been scattered to the four corners.  This exile was literal depiction of their hearts toward God.  But what God chastizes He will bring back to himself; as any loving Father would.

What intrigues me:

Considering the information we have on the role of women in Biblical times I have been perplexed by God's referral to His people, His believers, as a daughter.  Men were always so elevated amongst the heirarchy of social standing by Mosaic law.  Why would God chose to define His people with a feminine word?

Women were not to be completely silent, oppressed or passive victims. Consider these women:

1. Rahab, a prostitute who helped God's men escape beyond the wall,
2. Esther, who spoke to a king on behalf of her people when she was not summoned by him, a crime punishable by death and
3. Ruth, a widowed gentile who pursued Boaz in a time when the ramifications of such actions could leave her in a far more terrible state of destitution.

 These women moved with bold faith and their faith was rewarded. I long to be more like them.

Granted, there were laws to abide by for whatever reason but it was never God's intention for women to be devalued.  The law became twisted and preverted by scribes and pharisees; as all Godly things can be when left in the hands of man. One thing is for certain, women are just as important to God as any man.  The common referral to believers is, "the bride of Christ."  This referral to the body of Christ as His bride is representative of the church's soul in union with God.  Any real man knows that his wife is his greatest trust and because he is so invested in her well being she would willingly submit herself to his care (Ephesians 5:22-32). 

Surely, there are great injustices against women in the Bible and there is no denying that.  However, the same could be said of many men, especially Christ.  Sinless and blameless He endured a horrific death.  The good news: He won and with His victory we are ALL promised freedom. We were created specifically the way we are for a unique purpose.

YOU are the daughter of Zion, God's beloved.  That's a compliment. 

Warning! Warning! Too Invested In This World!

The thoughts on how to approach this subject have been rolling in my mind like little pebbles in the bed of a stream for several weeks.  Nothing was coming together coherently and I didn't know how to put it in writing.  Droplets of conversation, comments in movies or books, and social media have fueled this post.  On Sunday this video finally pushed the words to the edge and the dam that was stalling full comprehension and thought was completely demolished.

The words that needed to be spoken flooded through my pen and onto my church bulletin with ferocity.  I can only explain it as supernatural; craziness to anyone who doesn't understand how God works.  The one thing I can say with certainty is that this message must be spoken to all who will listen.  I'm insisting.

How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 

Matthew 7:4 NIV

Christians, you have been deceived!  You are too invested in this world's politics and protecting your hard earned wealth.  Your determination to protect what you have accumulated from others is completely contradictory to the teachings of Christ.  Politics cannot and will not honor your Father.  It holds you in bondage and keeps your mind pinned to things that will do nothing but harm His kingdom.

His commandment was to first and foremost love God and others.  Stop picketing with signs of judgment and condemnation.  Put that energy into something that glorifies God.  Prayer is a far more powerful tool than poster board and a hug is far louder than a bullhorn.  The enemy has you so concerned with the sin and judgment of others and how terrible this world is that you don't even notice that your condemnation of the actions of others is driving people away from the radical grace that saved YOU.  You are not entitled to His love and grace.  He gave it freely to each and every one of His created people and you are wasting that gift; hoarding it as though if it is shared you will diminish your salvation.  If you've ever lied, which we all have, then you have sin that is just as black as murder or lust.  God cannot tolerate sin and yet you've determined that there are sins far worse than any that you've committed.  

36 “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”

37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’[a] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[b] 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

Matthew 22:36-40 NIV

You are called to be a vessel of the Holy Spirit.  You are to teach and preach His good news.  Instead you are picketing the courthouse steps and screaming hellfire and brimstone to those who need to hear of His mercy, grace and love.  You will change nothing.  The only way to see real transformation is through love.  THAT is your job.  THAT is His commission to us.

Let me put it this way.  Judas betrayed Christ because He was not a messiah bent on overthrowing the political oppression of the day.  He wasn't storming Rome and telling Caeser to hit the pavement.  Sound familiar?  Because of this Judas sent Jesus to the cross to die a humble, humiliating and excruciating death.  Was it all for not?

I know this will spark debate.  I am prepared for whatever backlash this may present.  After all, how can I say this to a group of people who will remain hardened and not expect some type of denial or judgment.  Ultimately, I hope this brings forth thought and careful consideration to those who are willing to hear it.  As my pastor so astutely stated, "The Kingdom of God is seen in transformed lives that live very differently from the world around us--that seek to love the least, the last and the lost, that care for the downtrodden and aren't focused on personal fulfillment and getting their fair share."



The video is one of the many wonderful productions created by Gateway Community Church's creative team.  If you'd like to see more you can visit their vimeo at http://vimeo.com/video4gateway.  This video was not created for this blog.

Crack That Book Open

I met a woman this afternoon who had no front teeth.  When she saw my baby boy she smiled.  He looked at her confused wondering where her teeth were.  People like her carry a stigma: she must be poor if she can't get that fixed, she's probably a drug addict, she must be slow.  The story of a hard life was written all over her face but her smile sealed the stereotype of  a poor, drug addict working a part time job at the grocery store because she wasn't very bright.

The truth is something that most people don't really want to hear.  Her teeth had been knocked out by a former significant other.  "He took my teeth," were her words.  She was working at the grocery store because she wasn't allowed to think of herself as anything other than his punching bag so now this was all she was capable of doing.  Thankfully, a shelter had taken her in and saved her from this man, but the rest of the damage had been done.  My heart broke.

Society doesn't afford people who have had a rough go to be anything more than a loser.  We treat these people who need more love than others as a burden; someone to gawk at and presume we know their situation.  I know the despair this woman endured.  It's a pain and a fear that no person should ever encounter.  The person you sleep next to, the one who made a vow to protect you, is actually responsible for torturing you on a regular basis and may one day kill you.  If you are lucky enough to escape with your life then you must deal with the psychological damage.  You collapse at the thought of conflict and the walls close in if the exit of any room is blocked.  Some nights you wake up in a cold sweat with tears streaming down your face because he's entered your dreams.  I know that fear.  I was lucky.

It all sounds like a Lifetime movie, I know, but this stuff really does happen.  Relationships never start out violent.  It's always really good in the beginning until there's an argument that gets just a little too heated.  Then the next time it goes a little further.  Two or three years down the road you start to realize that you never wear things you want to because they've been deemed inappropriate, you don't participate in activities because you don't want the third degree on where you've been and every time there is a conflict there's another hole in the wall where it met the back of your head.  You're too ashamed to admit that you're battered.  You're Jennie Garth in Lies Of The Heart or Judith Light in one of the fifty movies she's done on the subject.

My new sister who survived the struggle is not just another stereotype.  She is hope.  Hope that there is life on the other side of a terrible situation.  Hope that even after such trauma there is still a reason to smile.  If you bother to open the tattered and weathered cover of her story you can see that she is strong.  She is beautiful.

Some of us have a support system praying and waiting for us to make the decision to get out.  A lot of us do not.  For those who don't there is help: http://www.bayareaturningpoint.org/

Christian? No, thank you.

The term Christian has become one of the most controversial labels applied to a believer today.  I was recently attacked on Twitter for attempting to explain an aspect of my faith.  His Twitter handle was Religulous.  Can't say that I didn't expect to have someone who actively pursues debate with someone who holds a different belief to understand or agree with me on any aspect of my faith.  At any rate, it got me to thinking.  What is a Christian?

It is not:
A political affiliation
A position of judgment
A rallying cry for the moral
Denying others rights or freedoms afforded to you
Believing that you are better off than anyone else
Exempt from sin

The Right has so brainwashed most of American Christians, mainly in the South, that in order to be on the side of good that you must be Conservative.  Not true!  If you look at the words of Jesus and even attempt to align them with a political party then you're missing the whole point.  He wants you to love and accept people where they are.  Don't worry about what He says is sinful behavior on their part and lay that focus on yourself.  Just allow yourself to be a conduit of His love and mercy.

If you wake up every morning with a determination to preach hell-fire and brimstone to a lost soul then consider it gone from the beginning.  Cornering someone in a supermarket or Facebook messaging that one gay/lesbian person you know about saving them from Hell then you will have a hard time convincing them that God loves them.  A decision to follow Christ is not always an immediate decision and we must respect His timing as perfect...because it is.  Not to mention that those actions make it appear that you have no struggle with sin and that you believe you are superior because you happened to make the decision to follow Christ sooner.  In reality, none of us are any better than a murder sitting on death row.  A sin is a sin.  There is no variation of color when it comes to what is clean and what is dirty.  We're all dirty.

So what is a Christ Follower (my preferred term)?

It is:
A person who is committed to carrying out the Great Commission
Someone who expresses love, which is a choice and not a feeling, to everyone equally
Giving freely to the poor including the man on the corner
Recognizing that you above all have sinned and fallen far short of God's glory

I am not saying that God's Word is void of anything other than the command to love.  I'm saying that I would prefer to live like God has told me to without worrying about every political move the president makes, without slandering someone who doesn't believe like I do or worrying about the dust in someone else's eye because Lord knows I have planks in my own.  I'm going to live my life dictated by hope.  That is what a Christ Follower does.

Ahhhh, love. . .

So I'm over my PMS/Menstrual rage and I've run across some notes I jotted down a few weeks ago. I tend to get thoughts and inspiration in waves. In this case, they came to me while driving to lunch with my honey. I was thinking about how much different and special this relationship is in comparison to anything I had previously. There were so many things that I now have that I did not before and the irony is, I didn't even know what I was missing. Here's what those messy "driving while writing" notes said:

Love endures.

Love allows for mistakes. (And, as it turns out, cranky days when your hormones are uncontrollable.)

BUT love does not cause damage.

Love means accepting a person just as they are but refusing to accept inappropriate behavior.

Love is holding someone accountable to do what's right according to God.

Love is an intimacy, another gift, that is given by God and we must handle it with care, just as our salvation.

Beyond falling in love, when our brains go all wonky, it is a choice to love someone. It is a promise and it takes work.

Love is having the safety to express any emotion you may feel and knowing that it will be handled with the utmost care.

So those are the things that decided to find their way into my head that day. I realize that this all can be found in Corinthians but this was a personal revelation to me. I love when that happens. It makes you realize just how blessed you truly are.

Ugh

It’s just another ordinary day with ordinary routines, schedules with the aches and pains that go along with it. I’m tired and very cranky. Being a woman sucks on some days. For the most part, my life is very blessed and I’m happy to be alive with a job, a wonderful fiancé and a beautiful daughter . . . but on days that I think my uterus may fall out, I’m a little peeved. I’m sorry if this is too much information for some, but for me and every other woman on the face of the earth, it is a very real and hateful reality. Your hormones wreak havoc on your every emotion, thought, desire, and hunger pang and all you can think about is crawling onto the couch with a good book, soft pillow and warm blanket and hide out from the world. Ah, but no. I’m here at work listening to other people’s gripes and complaints all the while thinking, “Whatever buddy. When you feel like someone is stabbing you repeatedly in the lower abdomen then we’ll talk but until then, you and your water bill are simply a minor problem that I really don’t give a jack about. Have a nice day.”

The other negative side to this whole situation is the fact that any time something is said that sounds even remotely like a negative; the tears come or anger flairs and it’s completely irrational and uncontrollable. It ain’t pretty. A beautiful, mild mannered woman can turn into a raving lunatic with hair standing on end and spittle flying and there’s no stopping it. I can say I’m not that bad but I can become basket case for a few days out of the month and I hate it. I hate being the victim of nature and taking out the frustration on the people I love. Adam only thought he was being punished by having to die but that’s not the case. He was being punished by Eve’s mood swings (and the removal of God’s constant fellowship but that’s only a side note in this rant). Death was a release from that imprisonment. Go figure. So not only does a woman suffer the physical side effects, but everyone in their path suffers some type of emotional stress if not physical disfigurement. Thanks to Eve and that damned serpent, we become moronic every 28 days.

Mmmmmmm. . .cupcakes.

The lessons in chick flicks

We went and saw Bride Wars last night. . .I won! As it turns out, Anne Hathaway's character has a huge dance scene which according to him made the whole movie worth it and, okay, I have to admit, she is really pretty and she can also dance. But on the way home he told me that he was happy to have seen it because he learned something. I didn't believe him at first but he was really sincere. Unfortunately, I can't really give too much detail because I don't want to give anything away because it's a super cute movie.

It just goes to show that if you allow yourself to be open and receptive to different experiences you will learn something. Life is all about living. Profound statement, right? If you don't allow yourself to experience new things then you will never fully understand just how special life truly is. I've learned a whole lot just in the last year because I have allowed myself to learn and I've opened my heart and my mind to people that I wouldn't have in the past. I haven't lost my core beliefs but I have learned how to better relate to people.

So class, what have we learned here today? That chick flicks, as goofy and as pointless as they sometimes may be, can still teach you a few things. Oh, and Anne Hathaway can dance.

Say what you need to say

I have found myself, with all my little trust issues, opening up. Yikes! I am still waiting for a pang of disappointment, which at this point is a totally unfounded worry and due in large part to personal insecurity. I don’t want to be taken advantage of but I also don’t want to miss out on something great because of fear. We all do that, I suppose. Let fear keep us from doing or saying what we want. It’s healthy to fear a consequence and we shouldn’t go off all willy nilly to accomplish something that will ultimately hurt us, but we shouldn’t allow the fear of rejection or isolation prevent us from even the slightest possibility of obtaining what we desire.

I have also learned that the possibility of things actually being taken at face value can actually happen. Yes, I know it’s crazy but it’s true and very rare. However, being completely honest for the purpose of making your feelings known (good, bad or indifferent) also presents the risk of being perceived as selfish. I have to say that other’s perceptions usually do not stop me from sharing what I feel compelled to share. If things go unsaid, then there is always that “what if” factor that just makes me uncomfortable. It is hard to find genuine people who are willing to tell the truth. When you do find them, you have to hang on, unless you like hearing lies, in which case ignorance is bliss. Well, it’s bliss until you fall flat on your face because you tripped over your own inflated ego.

So here’s the point: Say what you need to say (thank you, John Mayer) and open up to the possibility that you just might learn something in the process.